CHICAGO, IL — The Big Ten presidents and chancellors, again, delayed their vote to restart the Big Ten football season due to their anger over a tweet by user_770078 on Twitter:
“Really hope the Big Ten votes to restart football, today”.
According to reports, Rutgers president, Jonathan Holloway was fuming after reading the tweet. Nobody cared, but then the tweet made its way to the chancellors that mattered — angering many who couldn’t believe “a peasant like user_770078 DARE question” the conference’s original decision.
Negotiations broke down when the presidents from Nebraska, Ohio State and Iowa told the others to “quit being p!@#$ies” and “nobody gives a f!@# that you’re offended!”
Which further offended those presidents.
No word, yet, on if negotiations will resume after the group calms down. According to reports, the athletic directors from the offended schools are consoling their presidents — “patting their head and telling them they’re special.” Minnesota head football coach, PJ Fleck, rebuked his own president with this scathing response:
“Savoy’s Pizza. It’s elite! Row the pizza boat! Elite! Row the elite pizza boat! Wooooooooooo!”