BREAKING: Hitler Reincarnated as ‘That Guy Who Tweets at Recruits’

Sad Hitler

HELL (AKA Twitter) — In a statement early Monday morning the CEO of Hell Inc, The Devil, confirmed that the organization did indeed reincarnate Hitler as “That Guy That Tweets at Recruits”. The news comes as little surprise who follow “That Guy” closely, but the confirmations puts an end to any doubt or speculation.

According to the statement, Hitler had led several large but ultimately unsuccessful attempts to “purify” Hell and overthrow The Devil and most of demon-kind had grown weary of his antics. Thus, the decision was made to send him back to Earth as the lowest form of human scum possible.

Of course, not everybody is thrilled with the move. Hitler issued his own statement on the matter: “Why me? What did I do to dese– well, okay… there was THAT, but this seems a little harsh. Reincarnate me as a serial killer or the goop the builds up and clogs your drain, Scott Baio… anything, but ‘That Guy That Tweets at Recruits’… ugh!”

A petition on Change.org to send Hitler back to Hell as already accumulated 18 billion signatures. President Trump has said he will speak with The Devil and has promised to “build a wall around Hell and make Hell pay for it”.

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