Husker Fans Angrily Chant ‘NO HYPE’ at the Pythagorean Theorem

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LINCOLN, NE — A group of Husker fans have taken to the streets of Lincoln to protest “the math” as a symbol of “hyperbole” and “irrational expectations”. We talked to one protester who said:

“It’s time to put up or shutup. Boom! Yeah!”

Well, isn’t every game of every season kind of a “put up or shutup moment”?

“Well. Um. I mean. But this year especially!”

But, why?

“Because I’m sick of the hy– OMG! Dude! Check out this winter conditioning video. Dude! Nelson out there leading. Luuuuuuke! My boy! Man, look at the comraderie! Ah s!@#! Tug of war, baby. Pull that rope. Pull, baby, pull! Woot! Red squuuuuad! Dude, we could win the West next year, man!”

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