Husker Fans ‘Done’ With Jesus, Call For St. Peter to Start at Savior on Sunday

LINCOLN, NE — Well, it’s finally happened. The honeymoon with Jesus as Lord and Savior is over. Many Huskers fans have “moved on” from the son of a God and are looking at his back-up, St. Peter, to save all of humanity.

One fan in support of the switch, Jack Az, defended his position, “It’s just obvious Jesus has regressed. He’s hesitant. He doesn’t strike down evil like he used to. The devil is clearly in his head. St. Peter is decisive. Heaven is a lot more crisp when he’s playing Savior.”

When asked about Peter’s 0-2 record in battles VS the devil, Jack Az responded by saying, “THAT DOESN’T MATTER! Look how decisive he is. He’s crisp-looking. That’s what matters. Crispness. St. Peter is clearly crispier. CRISP!”

God has responded to the criticism saying, “Jesus is my Savior. I haven’t even thought of using anyone else.” Clearly, this Sunday is a big moment for Jesus to solidify his status and Lord as Savior.


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