LINCOLN, NE — In a shocking turn of events, a rumor floating around the Nebraska message boards has turned out to be… wrong. This tragedy came to light at 11:35 am, Monday morning, via tweet.
The event has sent Husker fans reeling:
@huskerhillbilly posted this shortly after the news broke, “I, I, I don’t even know how to respond. My life is a lie. Never before have the message boards led me astray. If you can’t believe anonymous users on the internet, who can you believe, ya know?”
Another user, @911wasininsidejob, had this to say: “I don’t believe it. I mean, what does she know? Or, she’s probably lying. My brother has a friend whose sister knows a guy who works in the administration and, according to him, this whole thing was an elaborate plan to discredit the message boards, because coaches are tired of the truth getting out.”
The Governor is expected to make a statement, aimed at quelling the unrest, reaffirming his faith in the Husker message boards. Rumor, on the message boards, has it that the President of the United States is going to accompany the Governor to add legitimacy to his statement.