Huskers Bringing 5-Year-Old To Iowa City To Double-Check Counting of Points

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LINCOLN, NE — Fred Hoiberg announced early Thursday morning that the Huskers will bring a local 5-year-old to Nebraska’s basketball game on Saturday in Iowa City “because… ya know… they ain’t real good at the countin.”

Of course, officials in Iowa City have sought to reassure visiting teams they have it under control. “We done did take off our shoes’n show yuz our toes. We can count rill high. To at least 11!”

Of course, Hoiberg isn’t backing down: “Jesus. 11? Yeah, we’re bringing the f!@#ing kid. FFS.”

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