Kansas City Parking Meter Suspended 5 Games After Malicious Hit

Parking Meter

KANSAS CITY, KS — A Kansas City parking meter has been suspended 5 games after this malicious hit:

When asked for comment on the suspension, the meter had this to say: “Hey, I’m entitled to my space. He ran into me. If anything, it’s offensive pass interference. Review that s!@#.”

Of course, the victim of the malicious hit tells a different story: “It’s f!@#ed up, man! We’re just having a good time, minding our own businesses and this psycho comes out of nowhere and blasts me. Didn’t even see it coming. That’s assault, brotha!”

No word yet on if Kansas authorities plan to pursue an internal affairs investigation into the parking meter’s actions.

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