Navy Investigation Finds Peace Sign ‘Not Symbol for Satanic Cult’

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ANNAPOLIS, MD — It’s been a busy week for Navy investigators. After investigating the totally plausible idea that cadets at the Naval Academy were flashing white power signs on national TV, thinking no one would notice, investigators also concluded their look at what apologists call a “peace sign” (but is clearly a symbol for their satanic cult).

The sign, two fingers held up with the rest clenched in a fist, when examined properly is obviously a pitch fork, one eerily similar to the one carried by the devil in cartoons. Only an idiot, or fellow cult member, would debate that.

Apologists say “we’ve been using that sign since the 70s, man.” But, obviously, that doesn’t matter. One guy from a satanic cult used it that one time so now anybody who uses it is clearly a member of that cult. What moron would think otherwise.

But, apparently, the Navy is a bunch of devil-worshipping white supremacists and flashing satanic cult, white power signs is A-okay with them. I knew I liked the Army better.

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