MINNEAPOLIS, MN — The Minnesota Athletic Department announced this morning that head coach, PJ Fleck, has been asked to star in the next Sharknado movie: Sharknado 3817: Row Motherf!@#er Row!
In the movie, the ambitious young Fleck takes his team out to sea on an old Viking-style sail boat to teach them about perserverance and hard work. And to, ya know, literally “row the boat”.
But, halfway through the journey a vicious tornado filled with man-eating sharks kicks up and Fleck and his team must fight to survive.
The movie ends with a much nicer, more-resourced, better-branded, motor-powered boat coming along. Fleck hops aboard and leaves his team to fend for themselves. Because we all know that’s coming at some point.