LINCOLN, NE — Insider reports, coming out of North Stadium, suggest Scott Frost is using the bye week to “exercise the demons” plaguing his Husker football team… literally.
According to those reports, famed witch doctor, Zaku Zaku, has been brought in to “clear” Memorial Stadium, the University campus and every sports team, except volleyball, of the spirit of former Nebraska head coach, Frank Solich.
Rituals reportedly include screaming “9-3 is okay” while being hit on the back with a wooden paddle, staring angrily at a picture of Bill Callahan and enduring 15 minutes of disappointed looks from Tom Osborne. Also, no hoodies may be worn the entire week.
We reached out to Frank Solich for comment on the move by Frost. He simply responded, “Muahahahahaha ehehehehehe ahahahaha ha!”
We’ll get a chance to see if Zaku Zaku is able to bring some “abacadabra” to Memorial Stadium as the Badgers roll into town in just over a week.
2 Responses
Need to rid the stadium, campus, staff, coaches, and players of the Steve Pedersen curse.
The latest reports say the coaches and players are also being subjected to “high-g training” in a machine named Mediocrity for just that purpose.